I’m up early, just as I usually am.  The waking dead.  And everyone is still asleep under sheets or just hiding from Wednesday, more present as the sun peaks over buildings.  My supervision was cancelled this morning, but I’m still alive and will likely be in the office long before I should be for no reason other than a small staffing with a case manager before my first appointment at one. 

It’s warmer in the house this morning and not nearly as cold as I step out onto the wet earth.  I walk to the mailbox and flip the flag forward.  The air feels slight as I hum it in.  Everything is quiet, but my mind never stops moving.  It’s everywhere.  I can’t stop it.  And maybe that’s why I’ll drive early to sit at my desk.  There, I feel like I’m more in control.  And instead of my mind racing about a million work things, I can be in the middle of it trying to solve whatever problems my mind creates for itself.

Half past nine, the office is humid, somehow.  I look over my schedule for the next three days.  No surprises, really.  No one is really here yet, but that’s okay.  I like being alone here.  I like the time I have to myself in my office.

I look over whatever manuals I’ve ordered for work and when they should arrive.  The Colour Revolt and Bon Iver vinyls I ordered for Chloe should be here soon.  I just feel impatient this morning.  Maybe a bit tense.  And I’m not sure what it is.